Production Diary: From Blastoid To Welcome 2 The World

Collaborations are a magical thing. A transatlantic sowing of seeds to create the perfect musical baby.

That’s what happened here. More or less.

Luxembourg’s Yenn has been on quite a roll of late, with the brilliant Forward, Symphony (with Refracture), and the Mau5-ey Monzen. Mr. Y sent me a couple of ideas he had sitting around, and my favorite was the melodic and haunting mini song ‘Hemorrhoid,’ I mean ‘Blastoid’.

Right away, I could hear the progressive electro anthem it would become. The vocal was especially interesting. You see, Yenn had just become a baby daddy for the first time and another friend, Scott Willis, was expecting his second. Well not directly, but you get the idea.

Maybe it was all the baby talk, because the first time I heard Blastoid, I also heard the vocal line in my head. It was quite the hook, and rare for a dance track in that it was about a father welcoming his kid, as opposed to the usual ‘Do You Like Bass’, ‘Set Me Free’, ‘Dance To It’, ‘Love Your Booty Movin’ etc.

With that, I got to work. From Blastoid, I already had the key of the song, the stabby pads, the arpeggio, and the square lead. I needed a bassline that was muy musculoso. Heck, I needed two basslines. One to drive the groove, and one to add a little wap at the back end. Sort of a smack to the bum, if you will.

If you’ve heard any of my music, you’ll know my basslines are usually also the hooks of my tracks (I call it Electro Bass, as discussed here), so this one had to be special. The whole song, as it turns out, ended up being a bit special, as it’s about something.

The bass went through several revisions until finally, at 4 am on a Saturday morning, it happened and two became one.

Now I needed a vocal. The lyrics took me about as long as the basslines, and while they ain’t Wordsworth, they are effective. I always knew I was going to sing it myself. Why? First laziness, and second, why not? I’m no American Idol, but I’ve got better teeth than Justin Bieber.

Breakdowns can be tricky. Almost everything has been done already, so they require some serious thought. Ultimately, I decided not to go for a ‘mental’ Apes From Space type mindf@ck (it is about a baby remember), and pulled back on the gas. It actually served the track well. Finally, a mix and a rough radio edit and here we are.

I love it. Just the right amount of melodic ecstasy and dirt, with all the ingredients to be a summer smash!

Labels, are you listening to this?


Phatso: My Bastard Son!

So, I do a little search on my favorite website for dance music,, to see if my latest Aaren San/Plasmapool remixes have dropped, and whaddayaknow, I have a son.

Right there. A little bastard Phatso. I have no idea who the mother is, but all signs point in the direction of Spanish digital label Cutoff Recordings who, as it turns out, are my ‘friends’ on supreme social networking mecca, Facebook.

I always knew that relationship was gonna be trouble.

Anyway, the track is called Introspection by Phatso. Simply Phatso. No bio, no birth certificate, no history. Just Phatso.

Do you know of your father, my son?

I can only assume the label had no clue there was a Phatso Brown out there (serving up fresh hot organic gooey Electro goodness since 2006, thank you ladies), and thus released a track by my bastardly boy.

It’s not a bad tune at all actually, a bit noodley perhaps but it’ll do just fine to warm up the crowd.

Plus, when was the last time you heard an Indian woman say this in a dance track (with a lovely Bombay accent to boot):

“With eyes tight shut
I hear the roar of my heart
A distinct discontent
It says to me
This is not to be, this is not to be”

This most certainly is not to be.

A couple of years ago, I ran into a producer named Phatzoo which is fine, and there is a wonderful Horror Core rapper by the name of Jamie Madrox who wears killer clown makeup and is, by his own admission, “a sick son of a bitch and dirty bastard”. He goes by Phatso sometimes (the same way Eminem goes by Slim Shady), and that is fine.

But this isn’t. Phatso. Brown. Phatso Brown.

It’s not a name to me. It’s who I am. My identity. My destiny.

If you’re making dance music and going by Phatso, and you’re not my bastard son, then you’re out of order.

Call yourself Phatman (but not boy ‘cuz a certain Norman Cook might have a problem with that). Call yourself Phat Bastard. Call yourself anything but Phatso.

I am Phatso. Can You Dig It?

The moral of the story, boys and girls and Superstar DJs, is to Trademark your unique ‘act’ name like its your very essence. Because it is.

P.S. My lovely associate tells me that this is a sign that I have arrived. I hope it’s not Heathrow again.

Release Report: F@ck Thru The Pain! Beatport Exclusive!

This is a big one ladies. Two of my underground anthems, old school robo funk workout Lose Control and grindy Electro monster F@ck Thru The Pain (FTTP), have been given a fresh lick of paint and re-released on the vibrant Noobish label.

And on the ‘B’ side, we have a spicy remix of FTTP courtesy of British Breaks star Refracture. Very tasty!

Get the release on Beatport!

Release Report: Yenn’s ‘Deep Hurts-The Remixes’. Beatport Exclusive!

Deep Hurts: The Remixes is out now only on Beatport. Featuring the hypnotic Yenn original, a stunning breaks mix by Refracture, and a driving Electro take by yours truly, this is another quality release from the Noobish label.

Preview and support at Beatport. And please promote legal MP3 downloads!

i’m just ready

before, our love wasn’t as deep

Phatso Brown’s ‘Breathless’ Remix on Chicago Party Mix FM


Windy city DJ hero Eddie ‘Getdown’ Ortiz features my remix of Aaren San’s Breathless on Chicago’s very own Party Mix FM. Thanks Eddie!

You can listen to the entire DJ set featuring Breathless (and what a set it is indeed) here:

Confessions of a Dance Music Producer…Straight From The Gut!

Looking for a high-octane crash course in the controversial and ever-changing world of electronic music?

Well, this is the next best thing!

Straight From The Gut!

Experience Electro as you never have before, through the eyes (and ears) of deeply troubled critically acclaimed  producer and DJ Phatso Brown.

Regular features include:

Production Diary: Follow a brand new Phatso Brown track from initial concept to final release. Readers are raving: “it’s a masterclass in the how-to’s of music production”, “a glimpse into just what it takes to create, master, and market your music in today’s world” and “hey, where’s the porn you promised?”

Unphiltered: Sure, you’ve been thinking it. But only Brown will say it. Stay tuned as Phatso takes a deeper look at some of dance music’s most burning questions, like just how did a geeky kid named Zimmerman become dance music’s hottest property?

Synth Odyssey: Join Phatso on a magnificent journey through his VSTi folder! It’s so much more glamorous than it sounds!

Electro of the Week: Hand selected, fresh Electro/House just for you! Organic!

Forgotten Classic: Some of the greatest electronic music you’ve never heard! Until now.

Slappin’ the Bass: The baddest bass lines in dance music and what we can learn from them!And none of that obvious stuff like ‘Billie Jean’ or ‘Another One Bites The Dust’ either! This man works hard on that low end…

Great Moments in Electro: A history lesson on a much misunderstood genre! Brown sets it straight!


And for a brief history of all things Phat and Brown, Track It Down and sample some tunage (i.e. super-fantastic blockbuster hit music).

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